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Prezradil ho v podstate koronavírus. Pár dní potom, než sa u nás objavil, odišiel môj muž na služobku. Teda aspoň mi to tak tvrdil. Vraj musí za klientom, kdesi k ukrajinským hraniciam. Občas takto ďaleko cestoval aj v minulosti, takže som nemala dôvod pochybovať. Keď sa však po troch dňoch vrátil, nešiel zrazu do práce. Vraj musí zostať v karanténe. Nechápala som. Jediný prípad, o ktorom sa hovorilo, bol zo Záhoria a on bol presne na opačnom konci republiky. Možno si pôvodne aj chystal nejaký neuveriteľný príbeh o tom, ako ho tam prekvapil zradný vírus, ale nakoniec šiel s pravdou von. Boli sa s kolegami lyžovať na juhu Rakúska… No super! Hovorili sme o tom predtým spolu, že je to momentálne nebezpečné, a súhlasil, že vzhľadom na to, že máme doma ani nie ročné dvojčatá, to fakt nie je teraz dobrý nápad. Neviem, či už vtedy, keď mi prikyvoval, mál plán, ako ma oklame. Alebo zapracovali kamaráti, ale vo výsledku je to jedno. Klamal ma, ohrozil seba aj nás a teraz sme doma všetci zavretí ako vo väzení. A je tu poriadne hustý vzduch. No nie preto, že nevetráme…

Buď kričíme, alebo mlčíme
Doteraz som sa všetkým tým správam o náraste rozvodov po karanténe v Číne v podstate smiala. A nechápala, ako ľudia, ktorí sa majú radi, nedokážu spolu vydržať pár týždňov doma. No dnes som sama v podobnej situácii. Problémy, ktoré mužov bláznivý výlet, spôsobil, sa totiž hromadia. Minul peniaze, ktoré nám dnes chýbajú, keďže v tejto situácii nemá ani zďaleka taký príjem ako predtým. Navyše priniesol domov strach, každé zakašľanie detí ma desí. Stal sa tak so mňa uzlíček nervov, no manžel sa namiesto toho, aby ma upokojil, skôr rozčuľuje, ako sa správam. A tak na seba buď kričíme, alebo mlčíme. Takmer nič medzi tým. A moja schopnosť zvládať tento stav je už na dne. Mám chuť dostať to zo seba, vykričať mu, čím ma kedy sklamal, aký je nezodpovedný a ľahkovážny, ale bojím sa, že u nás je už taká napätá atmosféra, že by došlo aj na facky. A to nechcem, naopak, potrebujem zatiahnuť brzdu a zaradiť z tejto slepej uličky spiatočku. Mám totiž strach, že momentálne nám obom chodia po rozume tie isté slová – poďme od seba. Pritom predtým sme na to ani raz nepomysleli, hoci s problémami sme už bojovali mnohokrát…


Janka O., (34), Bratislava

Odborníčka radí: Nenechajte sa vyprovokovať
Keď sme si problémy vo vzťahu do karantény už priniesli, lebo na ich riešenie nebol čas, na prvý pohľad by sa mohlo zdať, že nič lepšie sa nám nemohlo stať. Konečne si na to sadneme. Sme toho však v takej situácii podľa psychologičky PhDr. Evy Krkoškovej naozaj schopní?
Samozrejme, ale musia sa o to snažiť obaja, jeden nestačí. Slovenské príslovie hovorí, že ruka ruku umýva, sama sa neumyje. Ak sa aj rozhovor skončí hádkou, je dôležité zostať na racionálnej úrovni. V nej dokážeme nájsť dohodu, ak sa však pripoja emočné, cielené zásahy do našej osobnej sféry, pociťujeme citové zranenie. Vtedy chceme zranenie vrátiť, chceme, aby sa aj druhá strana cítila rovnako nepríjemne. Preto si musíme ustriehnuť prechod do emočnej roviny sporu a nenechať sa do nej vtiahnuť. To znamená nevracať rovnakou mincou a nenechať sa vyprovokovať. Pomáha humor, vyjadrenie náhľadu na situáciu aj slovné odmietnutie konfrontácie, či neočakávaný súhlas. Odporúčam, aby prvý, kto si uvedomí, že diskusia prechádza do emočnej roviny, to oznámil a zastavil pokračovanie ničivej škriepky.

Čo robiť, aby váš vzťah prežil karanténu?
1. Nezabúdajte, že na komunikáciu ste vždy dvaja, takže každý má polovičnú zásluhu na tom, ako prebieha.
2. Rozprávajte sa aj o svojich obavách. Nie je nutné strach ignorovať, naopak, treba o ňom hovoriť.
3. Ak sa vám niečo nepáči, povedzte to na rovinu, ale, samozrejme, bez zbytočnej dramatizácie.

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Prezradil ho v podstate koronavírus. Pár dní potom, než sa u nás objavil, odišiel môj muž na služobku. Teda aspoň mi to tak tvrdil. Vraj musí za klientom, kdesi k ukrajinským hraniciam. Občas takto ďaleko cestoval aj v minulosti, takže som nemala dôvod pochybovať. Keď sa však po troch dňoch vrátil, nešiel zrazu do práce. Vraj musí zostať v karanténe. Nechápala som. Jediný prípad, o ktorom sa hovorilo, bol zo Záhoria a on bol presne na opačnom konci republiky. Možno si pôvodne aj chystal nejaký neuveriteľný príbeh o tom, ako ho tam prekvapil zradný vírus, ale nakoniec šiel s pravdou von. Boli sa s kolegami lyžovať na juhu Rakúska… No super! Hovorili sme o tom predtým spolu, že je to momentálne nebezpečné, a súhlasil, že vzhľadom na to, že máme doma ani nie ročné dvojčatá, to fakt nie je teraz dobrý nápad. Neviem, či už vtedy, keď mi prikyvoval, mál plán, ako ma oklame. Alebo zapracovali kamaráti, ale vo výsledku je to jedno. Klamal ma, ohrozil seba aj nás a teraz sme doma všetci zavretí ako vo väzení. A je tu poriadne hustý vzduch. No nie preto, že nevetráme…

Buď kričíme, alebo mlčíme
Doteraz som sa všetkým tým správam o náraste rozvodov po karanténe v Číne v podstate smiala. A nechápala, ako ľudia, ktorí sa majú radi, nedokážu spolu vydržať pár týždňov doma. No dnes som sama v podobnej situácii. Problémy, ktoré mužov bláznivý výlet, spôsobil, sa totiž hromadia. Minul peniaze, ktoré nám dnes chýbajú, keďže v tejto situácii nemá ani zďaleka taký príjem ako predtým. Navyše priniesol domov strach, každé zakašľanie detí ma desí. Stal sa tak so mňa uzlíček nervov, no manžel sa namiesto toho, aby ma upokojil, skôr rozčuľuje, ako sa správam. A tak na seba buď kričíme, alebo mlčíme. Takmer nič medzi tým. A moja schopnosť zvládať tento stav je už na dne. Mám chuť dostať to zo seba, vykričať mu, čím ma kedy sklamal, aký je nezodpovedný a ľahkovážny, ale bojím sa, že u nás je už taká napätá atmosféra, že by došlo aj na facky. A to nechcem, naopak, potrebujem zatiahnuť brzdu a zaradiť z tejto slepej uličky spiatočku. Mám totiž strach, že momentálne nám obom chodia po rozume tie isté slová – poďme od seba. Pritom predtým sme na to ani raz nepomysleli, hoci s problémami sme už bojovali mnohokrát…


Janka O., (34), Bratislava

Odborníčka radí: Nenechajte sa vyprovokovať
Keď sme si problémy vo vzťahu do karantény už priniesli, lebo na ich riešenie nebol čas, na prvý pohľad by sa mohlo zdať, že nič lepšie sa nám nemohlo stať. Konečne si na to sadneme. Sme toho však v takej situácii podľa psychologičky PhDr. Evy Krkoškovej naozaj schopní?
Samozrejme, ale musia sa o to snažiť obaja, jeden nestačí. Slovenské príslovie hovorí, že ruka ruku umýva, sama sa neumyje. Ak sa aj rozhovor skončí hádkou, je dôležité zostať na racionálnej úrovni. V nej dokážeme nájsť dohodu, ak sa však pripoja emočné, cielené zásahy do našej osobnej sféry, pociťujeme citové zranenie. Vtedy chceme zranenie vrátiť, chceme, aby sa aj druhá strana cítila rovnako nepríjemne. Preto si musíme ustriehnuť prechod do emočnej roviny sporu a nenechať sa do nej vtiahnuť. To znamená nevracať rovnakou mincou a nenechať sa vyprovokovať. Pomáha humor, vyjadrenie náhľadu na situáciu aj slovné odmietnutie konfrontácie, či neočakávaný súhlas. Odporúčam, aby prvý, kto si uvedomí, že diskusia prechádza do emočnej roviny, to oznámil a zastavil pokračovanie ničivej škriepky.

Čo robiť, aby váš vzťah prežil karanténu?
1. Nezabúdajte, že na komunikáciu ste vždy dvaja, takže každý má polovičnú zásluhu na tom, ako prebieha.
2. Rozprávajte sa aj o svojich obavách. Nie je nutné strach ignorovať, naopak, treba o ňom hovoriť.
3. Ak sa vám niečo nepáči, povedzte to na rovinu, ale, samozrejme, bez zbytočnej dramatizácie.

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Úprimná spoveď čitateľky Janky: Bojím sa, že po karanténe príde rozvod

01.02.2021, 16:35
Vzťahy
Autor:
redakcia EVITAav
Nová pandémia môže mať podľa odborníkov obete nielen medzi nakazenými, ale aj medzi tými, ktorých zatvorila medzi múry bytu. Pred hádkami totižto ani rúško nechráni. Ako teda ochrániť naše vzťahy?


Janka O., (34), Bratislava

Odborníčka radí: Nenechajte sa vyprovokovať
Keď sme si problémy vo vzťahu do karantény už priniesli, lebo na ich riešenie nebol čas, na prvý pohľad by sa mohlo zdať, že nič lepšie sa nám nemohlo stať. Konečne si na to sadneme. Sme toho však v takej situácii podľa psychologičky PhDr. Evy Krkoškovej naozaj schopní?
Samozrejme, ale musia sa o to snažiť obaja, jeden nestačí. Slovenské príslovie hovorí, že ruka ruku umýva, sama sa neumyje. Ak sa aj rozhovor skončí hádkou, je dôležité zostať na racionálnej úrovni. V nej dokážeme nájsť dohodu, ak sa však pripoja emočné, cielené zásahy do našej osobnej sféry, pociťujeme citové zranenie. Vtedy chceme zranenie vrátiť, chceme, aby sa aj druhá strana cítila rovnako nepríjemne. Preto si musíme ustriehnuť prechod do emočnej roviny sporu a nenechať sa do nej vtiahnuť. To znamená nevracať rovnakou mincou a nenechať sa vyprovokovať. Pomáha humor, vyjadrenie náhľadu na situáciu aj slovné odmietnutie konfrontácie, či neočakávaný súhlas. Odporúčam, aby prvý, kto si uvedomí, že diskusia prechádza do emočnej roviny, to oznámil a zastavil pokračovanie ničivej škriepky.

Čo robiť, aby váš vzťah prežil karanténu?
1. Nezabúdajte, že na komunikáciu ste vždy dvaja, takže každý má polovičnú zásluhu na tom, ako prebieha.
2. Rozprávajte sa aj o svojich obavách. Nie je nutné strach ignorovať, naopak, treba o ňom hovoriť.
3. Ak sa vám niečo nepáči, povedzte to na rovinu, ale, samozrejme, bez zbytočnej dramatizácie.

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Elementy ženy: Vyšetrovaľ Matej Snopko

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28. január 2026 16:02